What can we learn from dating apps?
While there are some differences between men and women on how they approach online dating, the two more important factors for both are common interests and physical appearance.
It’s pretty obvious to say that having flattering photos of yourself will make it easier to swipe right, but looks aren’t everything. Usually, what’s more important when it comes to matching with someone is the type of photos that you have on your profile.
If you’re a man: Ab photos are quite effective (just avoid selfies- especially mirror selfies), a photo of you outside, a photo of you with your pet, a photo of you doing an interest- conversation starter,
Women tend to spend more time examining dating profiles than men do, so if you’re a guy who wants to match up with more women, it’ll be to your benefit to put a little extra effort filling out your profile. Add your interests, hobbies, where you studied, to make it easier for like-minded people to find you.
Now here’s what to avoid:
Photos where you look like everyone else- it’s a huge mistake when people put group photos in their profile (especially their primary photo!) because it’s hard to tell which one you are… which makes it easier for them to pass over you
A photo with your ex
Not having any photos of yourself
Another tip to improve your profile- some apps, like Bumble, will prime you to swipe right early on by showing what they consider the most successful profiles first. Look at the profiles of people the same sex as you to see what the app marks an “instant right swipe” and tweak your profile to more closely resemble it.
Next, let’s talk about about some of the rough patches that are inevitable with online dating.
First off, it’s probably no surprise that people lie.
It’s easy to fudge the truth online and the top 3 things that people lie about most often are:
Age, Height/Weight, and their Job
They do this perhaps to seems more attractive or successful that they feel that they are- but ultimately it doesn’t help them or you in the long run once people find out the truth. There’s no use lying or hiding parts of you unless you never plan on actually meeting anyone in real life. It’s always best to just stick with being honest and owning who you are.
People don’t really know what they want.
People will sometimes come up with arbitrary requirements that they think they need for a relationship, but they usually don’t matter at all and they say yes to some people, no to others and it nevers seems to make any sense why.
As you’re looking for a potential partner, spend some time to think about what it is that you really want. The characteristics needed for a long-term relationship are very different from a one night stand. Figure out the kind of person that would be the best match for you in terms of personality, values, and goals and create a set of standards that you stick to.
Once you know what kind of person you’re looking for, it’s easy to not worry about or waste time with people who you can tell are not a good fit.
Meet face to face as soon as possible.
You’ll never make a real, lasting connection with someone by staying online forever. You need to meet people in person to get a sense of who they are and if they’d be a good fit for you.
The longer you spend chatting back and forth online, the less likely you’ll actually ever meet them in real person and build anything meaningful.
People get bored fast, so if you don’t want to lose them, I would suggest asking the other person if they want to meet in person the same day you’ve matched with them.
Dating is more or less a numbers game. There are a ton of people out there in the world that would be a great match for you and you could build an incredible relationship with- and there’s even more people who aren’t. But you’ll never know whether or not someone will be right for you until you’ve met them and had a chance to get to know them and the only way to find someone who’s right for you is by meeting more people!
Thanks so much for watching! What are some of your online dating tips? Do you know what kind of person you’re looking for? Leave a comment below and don’t forget to like and subscribe as we’ll cover the whole gamut of dating and relationships!